Sighs and Hallelujahs Stories and thoughts about the adventures of life without arms

Too Busy

"Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."
Psalm 46:10

Too busy to write, to study and to relax.
So much to be done -- I'm just far too busy.

Too busy to go to church, to exercise or to do the dishes.
A mess: my kitchen and my mind share this in common.

Too busy to eat well and to take care of myself physically.
This pinched nerve in my neck serves as a reminder.

Too busy to plan my trip of a lifetime.
Italy beckons in the near future, but I'm too busy to plan for rest.

Too busy to pray or even to weep for Haiti.
If ever there was a time, it is now.

Too busy to feel; to feel for myself or for others.
A mind distracted has no emotion.

Why so busy, my soul?
What must you prove?

A man without arms juggling is surely entertaining, if not impressive.
Especially when he juggles so many balls at one time.

Making up for the wounded body God placed me in is tiring.
Maybe I was meant to live at a slower pace?

Maybe we all were.

But, that slower life is where the pain and mystery sneaks in.
It's where emotions come in waves;
where I'm forced to wrestle with God.

In just being, I am forced to look at myself in the mirror.
Naked, not wrapped in my activities or achievements.

Forced to see myself as a person that cannot earn approval.
It's a place I'd rather avoid.
And, well, I'm just too busy to linger there.

Too busy to sabbath.
Too busy to do what I desperately need.

Far too busy to be still.